response to Michele

I think that women are so concerned with how they look that it is almost unhealthy. I feel as though women don't really express their true beauty noadays because of all the make-up, plastic surgeries, clothing that sucks you in to appear thinner, and clothing in general making you appear a certain way. Magazines and TV shows and films have such a way about them trying to make a woman look perfect, but the truth of the matter is that there is no such thing! As you probably know, from the kind of work that you do, even the most beautiful movie star has some type of flaws. But the way that she is portrayed after being photo shopped and made to look tanner and thinner she "appears" perfect. This is the problem with society, we make women feel as though they have to present themselves as though they are perfect. My male friends tell me all the time that they hate when girls wear too much make up and that when they wake up to their girlfriend the next morning she looks like a completely different person until she reapplies her make-up again. I would never want to be seen like that, I want to be seen as how I really look, because truthfully, it's way too much work to have to constantly be perfect haha. I have so much respect for full figured models because they are not ashamed to hide their bodies and want to cater to the "not-so-perfect" crowd. I'm glad that these things even exist, otheriwise we would be forced to look at "perfect" people all day long, which would be a bore.

response post to Taara

Taara, I completely feel your pain. I have one friend who is heavier set and your situation is exactly the same thing I go through everytime we go shopping together. My friend will complain about the same things as your friend, how her stomach is too big and sticks out too much and how she can't wear anything too short because her legs have too much cellulite on them. This annoys me so much because she will compare me to her and make me feel bad about the size that I am ( and trust me, I am far from perfect and have plenty of flaws and insecurities about my body).But the one thing I try to tell my friend is that I have issues with finding clothes as well, because I am taller and pants tend to be short on me sometimes or maybe my chest doesnt fill out a shirt as well as hers does. It's hard to comfort a friend sometimes because you want to be honest, but at the same time you can't say everything you want to because you know it will jsut hurt their feelings. As to what Lindsey said, the part about where your friend might be fishing for you to tell her something that may not necessarily be true, well I have been there. And I find that it is best to just help them find what looks and fits best! lol If you go too much into detail then you'll will be seen as a very bad friend in their eyes because instead of boosting their self esteem you will just bring it down. I, for example expect nothing but honesty. I would rather a friend tell me something looks awful on me than to sugar coat it and say it looks "fine," because I know it doensn't look "fine," it look awful! haha. With situations like these you have to be careful even with nonverbal communication because the way you look at your friend when she comes out of the dressing room could open a whole new can of worms and send the completely wrong message that you weren't intending for. I've done that, made a face that implied negativity but in reality it was uncertainty. I've learned my lesson with that. haha

week 1

this is a response to Professor M's post during the first week:

Hi, I'm Katarzyna (Kat for short), I am 22 and finishing up my degree in August. As a response to your post Professor, I thinkg that more and more we are seeing gay couples expressing their sexuality publicly. I can understand why you were caught off guard. 1. your young daughter was with you being exposed to something people don't consider "normal and 2. it was two young boys kissing and acting like a couple. After 4 years of college, I learned a lot about people, and their sexualities. In high school, the gay kids would seclude themselves and would deny any homosexual allegations because they would be tormented, judged, and discriminated against. But being in college you see the gay world in a completely different light. Homosexuals are open and free to talk about it and flaunt it. They love themselves and who they are and are not afraid to act like it. I feel as though in high school people are much more narrow minded and haven't really had a taste of the real world yet. But after 4 years of college (the time to experiment and find yourself) you see and learn a lot just through observation. I am happy to hear that those two young boys felt secure enough in their own skin to be able to publicly express who they truly are. PDA in my opinion should be kept to a minimum and should be done in a classy way if necessary, whether straigh or gay. However, I feel as though society is in fact becoming used to the idea that homosexuals exist and the ARE real people with feelings and emotions. The realization is definitely a good thing though; when society keeps its mind closed off from reality then we start to have problems such as hate and discrimination. I hope that more and more people become open to homosexuality because it is in our present and our future and there is nothing anyone can do to prevent it. We are all human beings and deserve love in whichever way is good for us as individuals.
originally posted on May 20, 2010 12:00 am

Week 2

This gender moment has to do a little bit with last weeks reading but also this weeks: I was watching "That 70's Show" and Eric Forman was forced to go on a date with his mother. He was completely offended that he had to go out to see a movie/go shopping with his mom because men don't do that kind of stuff with their moms. Not to mention, if he was seen in public with his "mommy" he would be publicly humiliated (which he was anyways). Well, as him and his mom were having dinner at a pizzeria she said that one day he will thank her for spending a little time with her outside of the house. And this was so because by talking and getting to know each other outside of the daily routine of living together under the same roof, he can actually learn a thing or two from a female (his mom). He could learn something about himself and also learn possibly how women who have found themselves think and how women should be treated. this was supposed to be a life lesson type of thing for him, and I think he got it. He actually appreciated the fact that his mother wanted to spend time with him and that it actually didn't make him a "momma's boy." It brings me back to how boys disassociate themselves from their mothers because they don't want to be like them because from an early age they learn to be like their father and little girls are supposed to mimic and learn from their mom's. Well, Eric got a rude awakening that taught him a lesson...it is okay to watch and learn things from a parent of the opposite sex. It doesn't make you lame OR a sissy in his case. Also, talking to his mom about his relationship with his girlfriend Donna, made him appreciate his girlfriend and respect her even more. It seems as though men use foul language towards women, but Eric is not one of them because of his respect for his mother. If you ever watch the show, you can pick up on the nonverbal communications between the family members. You can quickly see how scared Eric is of his father when he raises his tone of voice, but when his mom is involved all she has to do is shoot him the "no no/ you're an idiot" look and Eric is fully aware that he should shut his mouth immediately or just run. lol. Seeing this episode and connecting it to the reading makes me think about how much communication goes on on a daily basis between everyone around you whether it be verbal/nonverbal, negative/positive, or derogatory/complementary.